Recently browsing The Guardian I stumbled upon an article that read ‘When children read to him, Danny does not criticise or correct their pronunciation. He just nods and pricks up an ear.
Danny is a greyhound and a novel way of encouraging pupils at Oakhill primary school in Tamworth, Staffordshire, to read aloud. A "listening dog", he is part of a scheme that originated in the US called Reading Education Assistance Dogs.
"It helps with their self-esteem in reading out loud because he is non-judgmental," says the dog's owner, Tony Nevett, who has a degree in animal-assisted therapy. "He doesn't judge them and he doesn't laugh at them. He's just a tool – the children don't realise they are reading, which they might not have the confidence to do in class."
This made me ponder what we are doing so badly that we are to be replaced by dogs! How could this idea have even been considered if we were doing a good job; Is it our lack of time, our lack of patience, our lack of knowledge, or just another thought up fad?
This provoked several feelings, the first being irritation as it seemed to imply that we are judgemental and laugh at our children! The second was disappointment that it could possibly be true. As a working mum I have felt the pull between ‘being at home for my children’ and having to go to work. Whether going to work is a personal choice or a basic need, it can be evident that you can’t be in two places at once. How do you manage this pull between the two?
Being with your children in body and mind rather than just body, gives the children so much more. I remember an incidence a few years ago driving in the car with my son when he was about 7 years old; he was talking non-stop and I was giving ‘yes’’ umm’ etc. in the right places but not really listening. I was too wrapped up thinking of numerous other things that I must do later. Now, I thought that I had got away with my lack of listening; but it was to be years later that my son informed me that ‘when you umm and say yes a lot mum, you’re not really listening are you?’ There I stood completely caught out like a rabbit in the headlights. If I think back to those times when I was superficially listening, it would not have taken much time and effort to listen deeply to what he had to say. After the bombshell had dropped I could not go back and correct my lack of listening but I could from this time onward consciously take the time out of my thoughts to give my attention to my child; after all I was not going to lose masses of time by doing this and what my children would get from this is a sense worthiness. These you cannot compare.
When you share your time with your children try arming yourself with preparation; have all the things that you need to do later planned and prepared beforehand so it does not encroach on the irreplaceable time with the children.
Research was undertaken by Alison Clark, Susan Mc Quail and Peter Moss of the Thomas Coram Research Unit which is part of the Institute of Education, at the University of London. The research showed that there was evidence of the impact of listening to young children gave them increased self-esteem and social competency, together with an insight into decision-making processes.
It can be that when in the thick of it you lose sight of how well you give your time. You can be spreading your time so thin it becomes invisible. If this rings true with you, please know that you have many options to lessen the constant spread of time. Get your time back and put it to good use, our coaching for mums programme will be invaluable. Coaching is far quicker and more effective than struggling on your own. If dogs can listen to our children, then this is a walk in the park.
